show me yours, I'll show you mine...

Last week, I discovered this groovy little post over at Cool People I Know.  I came to it by way of a challenge by the lovely Jen Lemen, urging us all to make a life list--to commit to paper 100 hearts desires you want to make come true.

Given that I had recently gone about rituals to shed myself of things I didn't want (fear especially) I thought it would be a wonderful positive exercise to remind my heart of all I did want.  I set about creating my list here.  It took me a week.

In between loads of laundry, or heating up dinner I would steal away for 5 minutes to write down something else that had occurred to me during the day. 

When I first started out, I had no idea how on earth I would get to 100.  It was all I could do to admit that I really wanted the first 20 items.   Its so easy to get into a mode of self-denial--of telling myself I can't have it, so don't ask for it--don't dare to even wish.  It dawned on me how incredibly limiting and well...crippling that can be.  Afterall, the first step to making our wildest and deepest darkest dreams come true is admitting that they are there.

But the assignment was to get to 100.  Stephanie and all the other cool people on this wiki were giving me permission, to go wild.  I threw off the self-repression and shone a light into the dark corners of my soul where old wishes lay dormant.  Pretty soon, I was cranking on my list.  I had turned on a spiggot and the ideas came flooding out.  Small aspirations and big wild messy dreams.  I had to really think and prioritize.  My top 100 dreams.  Just the most important.

I have my list now and am making a point of looking at it every day.  I ask myself how the actions I took today take me a tiny bit closer to crossing just one of those things off my list.  Its a little map for myself--a compass to keep me pointed in my hearts true direction.  I know that each dream crossed off will open the door for another to take its place and that is a beautiful thing.

In order to see my list you are going to need to create your own.  Do it--I double dog dare ya...